dear raging self

Portrait by Marc Steiner @marcartphotocreations

Dear Raging Self,

It has been my nature to be calm... and the quiet storm if need be.

Perhaps we made a contract early on not to let you have too much air time. I've never been one for angry. Especially if accompanied by yelling. Raging self you tend to get quiet rather than loud. Sometimes Contemplative Self gets mistaken for you because an aspect of you is prolonged thought... searching for answers (and after learning vipassana: noticing the muscle tension that accompanies you). Don't get me wrong I get frustrated, dissapointed and, yes even angry too. But Raging Self your anger doesn't stick around here long or often. You've been known to say just let me be upset, it will pass shortly. Some part of us needs to FEEL IT before we let it go. There is usually an urge to talk it out (you want to be heard)... or sometimes writing you out feels like you have passed... Raging self you tend to come to the surface when I am in an emotionally sensitive state and I am feeling pushed to my limits. You make me uncomfortable and I love that you teach me about setting boundaries. You also teach others about my boundaries...haha. I love that you teach me to get CURIOUS.

Raging self on those occassions when you decide to visit I want to give you space to breathe. I don't want to bury you where you can fester. I want to move through you with grace and find creative healthy outlets for you. You call for HEALING.

Raging self you are usually accompanied by deep sadness (perhaps from generations of ancestors before me - with tears held back). You remind me that something needs to be RELEASED. Mostly I find that we need to FORGIVE ourself and remember we have always been WHOLE. Raging Self be gentle on me, deal? Cool.

Love + Light

Be Wonderful

♡

LaToya

this is part of a series of love letters to self i wrote as prompted by @littleolovebird on instagram over a year ago. They are gems to me, so i will continue to share them her in my musings adding new insights and resources as i see fit.

Dear Overthinking Self

Dear OverThinking Self,

The thinking part is highly regarded, but "over" just tips the balance. I witness you when you get on a role, and sometimes I follow to see how far you will go... You are a great storyteller, but a bit repetitious. Let's just say I sleep much better when you take a break.

Where did you come from? Who let you loose?  Was it schooling that gave you permission? Instilling in me analysis + synthesis and underling + note-take? Who taught you to create these "non-versations" (as my husband likes to call them)? You know the ones where you work out what you Should have said or done... you must be in cahoots with EGO.

You know when I really met you?  10 days of silence... Vipassana. Woah... I saw you in full flow... I saw how you lead to physical sensations on my body and emotions...then I saw you settle down. Ahh... I CHOSE MY THOUGHTS.

This is meant to be a love letter you say... okay, I love your ability to plan and be forward thinking. Helping me to come to sound decisions + to keep an open mind - infinite possibilities. You help me to see the good in all situations (we are pretty good at that), you are quiet thoughtful. Deep down you are calling out for happiness + wellbeing. You want to be tamed. I TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.

I really love it when you are bursting with creative ideas + exciting possibilities. You make me smile at memories past + the dreams in the making + focus on the NOW. I love when you let intuition lead the way. I love how you pull past knowledge into the present to present new findings, comnections + insights.

I love how you step back while Creative Self take the floor.  #100daysofcollagedlife has been like healing balm for you.

You like to be acknowledged. I'm going to keep witnessing you + cultivating meditative practices to keep our relationship on good terms. I love that we aways get to choose what content we overthink about... I CREATE MY BEST LIFE

Love + Be Wonderful

♡

Me ×× P.S. these #lovelettersofmay have been good for you. Writing it all out has always worked for you. Also, we are reading Wayne Dyer's Your Erronous Zones and he left us some good reminders + tactics to keep us on good terms.

this is part of a series of love letters to self i wrote as prompted by @littleolovebird on instagram over a year ago. They are gems to me, so i will continue to share them her in my musings adding new insights and resources as i see fit.

Thrive (Pursuing Passion + Going Your Own Way)

GO YOUR OWN WAY. Blaze a trail. {often easier. Said than done, but when you trust yourself only more adventures arise}

Passion starts in EMBRACE, is explored further in INSPIRATION and is manifested in THRIVE when inspired action is taken (ACTIVATE).

Your passion is the thing you are drawn to do no matter what. Especially without outside prompting.

THINGS TO REMEMBER:

• Stay the course + stick to soul callings.

• Stop doubting.

• Self love + self care.

• Monitor thoughts.

• invest in yourself and own passion projects.  (grow existing successes).

• Purse what you love with dedication + persistance.

• Call upon ancestors for wisdom and renewal.

• Tap into eternal higher self - wise heart

The Visual Exploration:

A collage/ combination of images + text that I gathered on travels + wanderings.

The top image is from an Australian school atlas, the text is from a book I found in the op-shop free bin on a day when I asked for a sign/guidance, the bottom image is a bookmark i purchased on my first travels in Australia with a painting by an indigenous australian artist (it reminded me of an abstracted version of the herd with elements trying to go their own way - a combination of belonging + individuality - there is something beautiful about our combined pursuits ).

This act of combining cut papers is a part of my passion + each act helps me to process my thoughts + experiences. It helps me to sythesise my learnings + garner new insights. I am also realizing that exploring passions leads to defining your purpose on your own terms.

Be Wonderful

♡

LaToya

A Supportive Home (laboratory for life)

Consider your home as a laboratory for life.

Be Intentional.

When we intentionally guide our imagination we can create a home that expressess and supports our highest intentions + desires.

Take the perspective that your home is a stage for your authentic story + style to unfold, allowing it to aide you in reaching a deeper understanding of who you are and what your life here on Earth can be.  

Be aware of the general mood you infuse into your space, while acknowledging the need for our home space to accomodate all our moods (shadow selves included).

Home is a tool to express yourself, it can remind you of the happiness that lies within you - If you seek outside yourself you will always be elluded. Instead express the inside on the outside.

It is up to you to create a home that supports a way of life that appeals to you. consider designing spaces that allow for you to live out your personal manifesto.

When we get our home in order other areas of life may begin to follow suit - it is a reciprocal process.

BE Wonderful

♡

LaToya

Do it All Again

1// SOME THINGS (take time)

musings on kindly guiding yourself back to your vision:

I took this pic almost 3 years ago. It's a blurry pic, but here's the story.... We were in Tasmania as part of a 6 month road trip - J was touring his music, similar to what we are doing now.

While traveling my idea machine goes into full drive... IMAGINATION is one of my favourite dwelling places + this pic was me putting one of the ideas into action. This was was my desk for the day - a bench at a campsite that was being warmed by the sun on a chilly morning in Tasmania.

i decided i would create a series of little collages to illustrate a song J + I sing for Z, it is based on our early days as a family of 3 (but it all still applies).

I made these collages mostly in the front seat of the troop carrier with piles of scraps at my feet. (some things don't change, haha)

the collages are glued to used cereal + granola bar boxes that i ripped down to size.

It was meant to be a quick easy project...

2// This is a picture of one of the final drafts of collage with text/ lyrics in place.

After some back + forth, making a simple concept more complicated... I shelved this project. But it was always on my to do list to complete it.

Life happened... new ideas + new projects.

I continued to gently guide myself back...

3// walk with me to the ocean shore

put on the shoes we left at the door

salt in the air + sand at our feet

stop + chat with the people that we meet.

DO IT ALL AGAIN (a family tale)

now available in a square format

avaiable for purchase here.

Be Wonderful

♡

LaToya

p.s. keep pursuing your dreams